21st April 2018 – The date of my last blog. Alice was a mere 7 weeks old and Oliver had literally just turned 2. Life as a mother of two children had barely begun and I was settling in to my maternity leave.
So here we are, over 9 months later . . . Where the hell have I been?? The answer – Surviving. I have been surviving. This may sound dramatic but I guess that’s how I feel about it. So much has changed in the last year, I can’t really comprehend it. We went from a family of 3 to a family of 4, my husband decided to quit the security of a monthly salary and became self employed, we moved house, we brought a truck and then at the end of all that, I went back to work. Utterly ridiculous. There’s too much here for me to share with you in one post, so I’ll just mention the highlights and I’ll write more for you soon.
Being frank, the shift from being a mother of one child to a mother of two has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever faced. Don’t get me wrong, I love my babies to the moon and back, but my god, having two of them under the age of three brings a whole new meaning to the word “demanding”! Simon and I made the conscious decision to have a relatively small gap between babies because we wanted to “get the no sleep phase over in one hit”. To be fair, I think there are lots of reasons why it’s great to have a small age gap between siblings but if you value your sleep, make the gap bigger!
I remember acknowledging that pressure I felt as a first time mum to make it look easy and like I knew exactly what I was doing while meeting all of the ridiculous standards set by social media, when in reality I had no clue. I remember getting to a point when I effectively said f*** it, I’m going to trust my instincts and do what I think is right – life got easier and more enjoyable at that point. Weirdly when Alice came along, all of that confidence and common sense effectively fell out of my head and it was like starting all over again!
Home life changed very suddenly shortly after Alice was born when Simon decided to stick it to ‘the Man’ and go self employed. Because of that decision we also decided to speed up our long term aim of moving house. In short this was stupid, but the long term outlook is perfect as we’re now all set up for the school years and in an area I’m super happy with. This is also where the new truck bit comes in!
So the return to work . . . The big one. Well that’s probably worth a blog post all of it’s own (as well as several months of therapy), so we’ll return to that one another time. For now I’ll say that I did it, calling it tough is an understatement, and I’ve never done so much self analysis in my life!!
Sorry for the radio silence, but She’s a Working Mum is now officially back! Dani and I have lots more to share with you if you’re willing to read it! Watch this space!
Much love xx